After more than four years, my wife has fully embraced being the key holder. She is also exploring her dominance over me outside of our bedroom. Her efforts are somewhat weaker compared to those of her former girlfriend (my Mistress), but she now tells me to make coffee for her—a significant step for her. At times, she even talks back. Oh dear! Tonight during sex, I discovered a few things. She finds sex quite enjoyable because my moans of sexual frustration turn her on. She laughs heartily. She no longer feels guilty admitting that my penis is too small for intercourse, which has been the primary reason we haven’t had it for twenty years. Previously, she offered other excuses like preferring women or discomfort. The truth is out; she knows I don’t mind because I accept it. Many guys pretend their size is fine when partners say otherwise to protect feelings.
She is also okay with me staying locked during sex, citing the risk of her getting carried away or me finishing too quickly as reasons. She prefers not to take that chance. My moans of sexual need persist even while caged and they arouse her. Apparently, she has canceled my wedding anniversary orgasm for October next year. She doesn’t want to deal with me post-orgasm only to start the process over again to get me back to where I am now. She thinks I seem fine without it anyway and indicated a preference that I avoid orgasms unless there is a mental health issue involved. I suspect my improved health comes from not worrying about erections or performance anxiety/stress. Before, my heart would race and I’d get hot flashes due to performance anxiety. I was nervous and embarrassed by the state of my penis. Now, I am at peace.
Before chastity, my wife wasn’t interested in sex unless her girlfriend was in bed with us. As we were both depressed trying to adjust from a poly triad that lasted thirty years into being just a couple (which we weren’t great at after our first year), it made sense. I was sexually frustrated by the lack of sex since, prior to seven years ago, we mostly had threesomes and I was used to one-on-one sex with both girls afterward—that’s three times a night on several nights weekly for thirty years, plus about six other girlfriends to care for too. I loved my wife and others but submitted to our girlfriend. I had the best of both worlds until it ended.
Post-chastity, my wife is very into sex—or rather, orgasms again. She reaches orgasm in under three minutes now, at least for the first one. Instead of 5 or 10 back-to-back, she has 1-3 at a time, which is impressive for her age compared to friends who have none. She even masturbates more than having sex with me; we haven’t shared a bedroom in about thirty-seven years due to various reasons starting when her girlfriend lived here and wanted to avoid the ‘who sleeps with whom’ dynamics common in poly families. Now she masturbates on several nights, explaining why she isn’t always keen on sleeping with me unless my moans of frustration or kissing/fondling prompt it.
So, does your keyholder have orgasms without you present (other than when away)? Is it more often than with you? Has she decided you shouldn’t orgasm for as long as possible, and what are your thoughts on that frequency? My wife weaned me from orgasms over four years of steady denial. We aren’t like those guys who went from daily orgasms to being locked up, feminized by a dominatrix wife within ten days. We are real; I am just teased and denied. I don’t expect my wife to become as dominant as her girlfriend was despite her cute attempts with that fearful look!:) It doesn’t bother me much if she keeps some orgasms for herself. I used to masturbate more, so it was fine then; now she invites me to watch sometimes but wants private time.
Share your thoughts on whether wives have orgasms without you and how long you’d go without one with no say in the matter. I got what I asked for plus more. Not sure about ‘more,’ though not having orgasms doesn’t bother me anymore, likely due to age, lower libido, low testosterone, diabetes, antidepressants affecting my brain, avoiding performance anxiety, and accepting that while my penis isn’t perfect, it is useful primarily for orgams with a limp one. The real question remains: which causes what?