don’t hesitate to share your thoughts or pose any queries:) I am approaching the one-year mark of my chastity journey and have decided to launch a fresh blog, as I no longer view this merely as an introductory phase. For those curious about my earlier reflections and some rather spicy encounters, you can find my previous writings at .
The question of what drove me into chastity is quite interesting, and I suspect many of us share similar origins. To summarize the backstory: I struggled with excessive masturbation from day one, right back to my first orgasm when I was just eleven years old due to early puberty. The sensation was so intense that as soon as it faded, I craved more. This became a multiple-times-a-day habit that persisted until last year—roughly 21 years of frequent self-pleasure. Because I started young, it felt like such a natural routine, though one that can spiral out of control easily. Add to that the era of internet porn growing up with me, and you can see how my addiction was fueled.
By high school, my hormones were raging as they do for all teens. Despite being quite good-looking during those years, I didn’t date many women. Two factors held back my social life: low self-confidence and a natural submissiveness toward women that persisted from the start. My confidence suffered because I came out of junior high as somewhat of an overweight nerd. My submissive streak likely stems from growing up in a home with my mother and two older sisters; while my father was present, he traveled frequently for work, so I grew accustomed to—and actually liked—women giving me directions.
When high school arrived, I underwent a miraculous transformation over the summer, evolving into one of those guys who suddenly looked great. I shot up to six feet tall, slimmed down, and styled my hair differently. Yet my mind hadn’t caught up with my new appearance; inside, I still felt like that chubby nerd. Consequently, I remained a pleasant, submissive boy whom many girls overlooked because I wasn’t part of the “bad boys” crowd. On dates, I was often just too sweet and respectful for their liking.
During my junior year, a senior girl became infatuated with me. She was quite attractive, though others found her loud and opinionated—which was entirely fair. We aren’t sure exactly how we started hanging out, but we did. One night, while talking on the phone, she bluntly told me she wanted to sleep with me and thought I was very hot. It was thrilling; we were making plans, and she even intended to buy special lingerie for our encounter. I asked if she would tie my hands and “take charge,” noting that she planned to only bind one hand so I could still undress her.
Alas, in the end, my low self-confidence won out, and I chickened out without getting laid—a good thing perhaps, as it might have altered who I am, potentially leaving me a cocky jerk. Fast forward three years and several sexless relationships later, I met my soulmate and best friend. We crossed paths in a college English 102 class.
I’m not entirely sure what the secret is, but no one has ever made me feel as at ease as mistress does. She has always been such a kind, warm, and loving woman. One night, nearly three weeks into our relationship, she told me she loved me and had chosen me. I completely melted; the woman of my dreams expressed her love and desire for me from that very first glance.
Going back slightly… We were attending an English class together. I had certainly noticed her before but assumed she was out of my league and never initiated conversation. Little did I know, she had been watching me closely every day for several weeks, which I discovered later.
In early October, when I was twenty years old working at a mall store, there was a calendar stand set up the night prior right next to where I worked. Arriving for my shift, sure enough, there stood mistress by the cash register manning the calendar display, looking as beautiful and radiant as ever. I watched her for a moment before approaching. She is nearly six feet tall with lovely natural auburn-red hair that extends just past her jawline and flips outward. Her soft brown eyes are complemented by light freckles on her pretty face. I couldn’t help but notice how great her ass looked in her dark blue skinny jeans, along with an incredible 38C chest. If anything, “drooling” might be a more accurate description of my state than just looking.
She caught me staring and began walking toward me. I was thrilled, barely believing it was happening. We connected instantly, and I have never felt so immediately comfortable or welcomed by anyone as I did with her. We talked throughout our shifts until the mall closed around that time. Gathering my courage, I made a dorky yet cheesy proposal for a date, and she gave me her number. That night, we hung out with one of her friends; I treated them both to dinner, and it was wonderful.
Two days after that evening, while driving to work, mistress called my cell phone. It felt surreal because I had adhered strictly to the “two-day no call” rule since I liked her so much I didn’t want to seem too eager (foolish right?). But she knew what she wanted and asked me out again just two nights later. Three weeks after that, she took my virginity, and I became hers.
These last twelve years have been absolutely incredible with her; she remains the woman of my dreams, and I am fortunate that she puts up with me. About a year into our relationship, some of my porn-induced fetish tendencies spilled over into our sexual life. Even though we were having frequent sex, I continued masturbating and watching porn constantly.
I consumed so much content that I began seeking out harder material because it was what I needed to climax; my tastes grew darker. I have a strong latex/PVC fetish and adore sexy little outfits crafted from these materials—a niche well-covered in porn, as many of us know. So, I purchased my mistress a black pleated PVC skirt, a matching short zip-front tank top, and fishnet stockings. I laid them all out on my bed and covered them with my blanket (we were not yet living together). My queen was due to arrive soon, and I wanted to surprise her with the outfit to gauge her reaction.
She arrived, we relaxed for a bit, and then I led her into my bedroom to reveal the surprise. She looked curious as I whipped off the blanket to expose the attire. She was slightly shocked by what I had bought but smiled warmly. After that initial surprise passed, she undressed to try them on.
Oh my god, did she look gorgeous in that outfit! Her breasts filled out the top beautifully, the skirt hugged her hips perfectly, and her rear looked stunning—plus, damn, those fishnets made her legs look sexy. I instantly got hard, and she came over just to see how aroused I was from her appearance. We lay together on my bed making out; my cock remained fully erect. I adored the feeling of the material against her warm, soft body. There was an arousing scent from the fabric itself mixed with her perfume, all driving me wild. It was some of the best and most unforgettable sex I’ve ever experienced because she made my fantasy real. The mental image of her in that outfit will remain forever etched in my memory and is keeping chastity tight just by thinking about her.
well… this turned into an issue for me. I assumed she enjoyed the clothes and wanted to buy her all sorts of slutty, whorish items to satisfy my fetish. Over time, I purchased a great deal of these outfits; I am certain I have spent thousands on them, even if some were only worn once or twice. I constantly tried to persuade her to wear them for me. She did so initially but eventually grew reluctant and outright refused to don them anymore, which made me feel she was becoming self-conscious about it. I felt compelled to have her wear the outfits because pornography had set such unrealistic standards that seeing her in those garments is what aroused me; I struggled to reach an orgasm unless she was dressed up like that. This issue lasted for a long time even though we maintained a wonderful relationship as best friends, yet I was subtly pushing her away without realizing it.
Eventually, like many couples, we decided to have a child after nine years together and three of marriage. The sex during mistress’s pregnancy was incredibly intense; wow! I could not believe how sexual she remained throughout those nine months—she seemed as horny as I did constantly, making us almost unable to keep up with one another. By then, my requests for her to wear the outfits had lessened because she no longer fit into them due to the baby, and I know she was relieved not to have to deal with them.
After our son arrived, mistress and I focused on him. Her libido dropped significantly. She endured a lot during childbirth and had very little sex drive for the first year and a half postpartum. In fact, we struggled with PIV intercourse for about six months because it caused her pain when I entered her, so we paused our sexual activity.
This is where my poor habits crashed down on me like a ton of bricks. Instead of figuring out what works for my queen and how to make her happy, I just kept jerking off and watching more wired porn, selfishly catering to myself while neglecting intimacy between us despite our deep love. We went weeks without real connection; she would head to the bedroom after the baby slept, I would retreat to the living room, and if we needed to talk, we texted from only thirty feet apart. Granted, with a new infant there is much going on, so intimacy was not top priority at that moment, but it serves as support and reassurance that you are truly loved by your partner.
We did experience one powerful intimate moment a couple of weeks after our son’s birth—it was the first real break we had. My mother came over to watch the baby while mistress and I caught up on much-needed sleep. Unable to fall asleep immediately, we lay there gazing at each other before passionately making out. I squeezed her breasts and milk flowed; she wanted me to lick and suck her nipples, which I did gladly. They were so sensitive that I nearly gave her an orgasm through nipple play alone, though I could not stimulate her clit because it was still very tender. At the time, mistress claimed this was the most intense passion she had ever felt. Although there was no intercourse, it was a remarkable moment for us both.
Unfortunately, as noted above, nothing else came close to that level of passion and intimacy for the next year and a half.
One day over a year later, mistress was out while I stayed home alone. I grabbed my laptop and began my usual self-pleasuring routine. Today felt different because I was bored with my standard material and needed something more stimulating to send my cock over the top. I stumbled upon cuckold porn and thought, why not? Wow, this stuff was hot! I found even more content that was seriously steamy and dirty. For about two weeks, I was on a cuckold kick until I discovered Male Chastity combined with cuckolding. This seemed interesting as I watched videos and touched myself.
For the first time in ages, I fantasized about my wife—not just generally, but specifically seeing her getting pounded hard by another man while I helplessly bound in the corner. It was the first time I had sexually imagined my wife in a long period. Even though it felt strange, reviving such strong sexual feelings for her felt good.
Something funny happened when I ejaculated: I realized how much I truly wanted my wife and that I did not actually want another man fucking her. This made me reflect on how I had been pushing mistress away over the last 18 months by failing to give her the attention she deserved.
From there, I researched MC further and found genuine sites discussing it for relationship building. One site was Kept For . They featured a section called “tips for him.” As I read through it, I felt a pit in my stomach because of how the article resonated with me. It emphasized that partners should treat each other better and show utmost respect. Masturbation and porn were described as forms of cheating… In essence, masturbation shifts focus away from the woman in your life toward personal goals, making you less attentive and ultimately careless. Jerking off signals that I care more about my needs than yours.
All this hit me like a ton of bricks after reading those insights. I felt guilty for the decade of forcing slutty outfits on her when she did not really want them, while looking at porn and other naked women online instead of worshipping mistress’s beautiful mind and body to deepen our connection. I wanted back that intense feeling we shared like in the beginning and right after our son was born. Ultimately, I wanted to re-fall in love with my wife—not because we fell out of love, but because ours needed an overhaul.
When I read about chastity, it seemed so fitting for me, especially since I was addicted to masturbation, plus the fact that it is a really hot fetish didn’t hurt either and the benefits were clear. After two weeks of research and refraining from porn and masturbating, I gathered enough courage to ask mistress if she would be my keyholder.
(to be continued)
please feel free to comment or ask any questions if you wish:)