My initial post could easily become a book with just a few more paragraphs.:) I have much to share regarding what led me toward Chastity, my time experiencing it, and why I am now treating it as an occasional enhancement to our Tease and Denial routine. Generally, I can summarize our decision to step back from making Chastity our primary fetish by pointing out the hassle of wearing a device around the clock for various reasons, plus realizing that both my wife and I enjoy having my orgasms. It appears that mine are a major trigger for hers. While she does reach climax simply by teasing me until I am moaning and begging for release, her second, more powerful one happens when I cum and spray her. That is what really gets to her. It also makes her feel good about helping make me feel good. She wasn’t enjoying denying me for extended periods.
We hoped we could gradually extend the time between my orgasms to see how it affected both of us. Turns out that the longer I went without, the less interested in sex I became, and my orgasms weren’t as satisfying as they were after just a few days off. Plus, I grew irritable if denied an orgasm for too long. While constant arousal felt good, having actual release felt better. I am already quite energetic; so much so that I take medication to calm down. You can see some of that energy in my lengthy posts here. I just keep going on, so wanting even more energy wasn’t something I needed. I have always been a very attentive husband who likes cuddling after sex and has consistently put my wife’s pleasure first, both inside and outside the bedroom.
I firmly believe that the threat of losing regular orgasms is just as powerful an inducement to worship your wife as the enticement of having them. It’s really just a matter of which approach works for you. I now know which way suits me best.:) The CB6000 ended up being a hassle for both my wife and I, and refraining from masturbating for a few days is no hard task anymore since we have resumed regular and often sex, unlike before. Neither of us ever viewed the CB6000 as anything more than a hunk of plastic; it held no symbolism for us. When I first told my wife that she now owns my penis, she replied that she has always owned all of me anyway.:)
Since I will not be practicing chastity long-term, or at least keeping it for more than a few days, our Chastity play has been relegated to a very minor role in our Tease and Denial games. I will probably be put into the device on Fridays when my wife is gone most of the day so that I can be reminded of the sex coming up the next day, but that’s about it. I have enough self-control to refrain from masturbation for a few days as long as I know there is a prize at the end of the wait.:)
So thank you to all who have been kind to me, and I wish everyone lots of fun and few orgasms.:) I suspect that most of the estimated 1 million people a year who buy Chastity devices use them full-time after the initial excitement wears off. I know that Chastity was a big turn-on for me as a fantasy and remained so for two months while practicing it. However, as happens with many fetishes that appeal to us, the reality wasn’t quite as good as the fantasy. Just like fantasizing about being whipped until you are marked all over makes for a great dream—at least to me it does—the reality is that it hurts a lot, and I can only take so many bruises and welts before having enough. Some have pushed me further than that but not as far as my fantasy went.
So I will say farewell to all. I know my posts were long and perhaps not the most arousing to read, but I like helping people who are just getting into fetish play. All too often I come across men living their online fantasies with stories that cannot possibly be true, unless someone can be forced into Chastity while asleep, or forced to dress up as a main servant for all friends and family, simply because his wife has pictures of him dressed like a girl. No one is forced to do anything they don’t want to when it comes to sex. I caution you not to take someone else’s fantasy and make it your own down to the details; that will set you up for disappointment. It is much better to just come away with the gist of the fantasy and then flesh it out as you go along, keeping what works and discarding what doesn’t. That is how I do it, and by doing so, I am never disappointed because my wife does not want to be called Mistress and asks me to do things rather than ordering me around.
One last message for those that long for a fetish partner. My experience has been that it is far easier to find a woman open to sexual exploration and get her involved in your Chastity play rather than trying to find someone already into it. Remember that Mistresses, for the most part, are made not born. No one grows up learning how to use a whip unless they are a lion tamer.:) Also, go slow. Nothing scares a woman more than dumping a long and involved fantasy on her out of the blue. Ease them into it. Hey, it took me 40 years to get my wife to become more dominant, and even then, she still says she has problems asking me to do things that she knows I might not want to do at that time. Do not expect instant results. Start off with little things and go from there. It will become evident if your partner is getting into the Chastity play or just going through the motions this way. I sound a bit preachy, but my heart goes out to all those men posting looking for dominant women or keyholders. I know from personal experience that online fetish play never quite scratches your itch enough to fully satisfy you. It may even push you into a well-defined fantasy that isn’t realistic outside of the internet or paid-for-play scenarios.
OK, that is all. Goodbye and good luck, and may all your orgasms be few and far between!:)