I’m preparing for my inaugural time in the lock. Earlier, I shared some of my mixed feelings about this experience in our ‘hello world’ thread.
Here is a quick summary: I have always dreamed of being locked up, but I wasn’t sure if others kept it on long-term. My wife and I reached a work milestone that sparked excitement, leading us to order a CB600s straight from China at a low price. She is open to indulging my fantasy, so I started researching online safety concerns. It appears people do maintain this lifestyle for the long haul, but many start just like me: wanting a short-term trial of their dream. The wife might be unsure initially but agrees because she loves her husband; eventually, both partners enjoy it greatly, and it evolves into extended lockup and denial.
I expressed my excitement earlier, along with some fear. I only realized today that I am completely addicted to orgasms—utterly so. I adore them. I love being able to masturbate or get an erection and then persuade (or annoy) my wife into sexual intimacy. So, my worry is that we will both grow to enjoy using the device, leading to progressively longer periods of lockup until it becomes 24/7. At some point, even a slight breeze might prevent me from getting erect, or I won’t be able to jerk off when inspiration strikes—any time at all.
Today, reflecting on how much I value that release, I realized something: the pleasure isn’t just about having an erection; it is about the choice between sex and self-gratification. I wondered if masturbating might border on cheating (having sexual satisfaction with someone other than my spouse). My wife doesn’t know I do it. If she discovered it, I suspect she would be horrified. I feel I need to show more respect and affection toward her, prioritizing her needs since the professional stress has been tough for her, and I haven’t always responded well to that pressure.
Now, excitement is building at the thought that wearing a cage for several days, unable to masturbate multiple times daily, could make me more responsive, loving, and caring. It might even help alleviate some of her depression enough to reduce her medication needs. It isn’t a huge issue; she’s simply worn out by stress. If I become more attentive, I can help relieve that burden for her.
However, my self-pleasure habits are quite selfish, which likely hinders my desire to step up and ease her load. I wanted this to be a fun kinky experience for us (okay, let’s be honest—for me). But if wearing the device more often helps curb my selfishness and makes me more responsive to her needs, isn’t that positive? I am confident I can adjust to losing two or three orgasms a day.
I have attempted to quit masturbating before, but never for longer than two or three days. Those short dry spells were miserable!
Will I be posting in six to twelve months about how this experience broke a selfish habit I’ve battled for ten years? (And I am not even forty yet!) Maybe so. Since the device hasn’t arrived at our door just yet, I technically know very little right now. I started this thread seeking support and suggestions as my willing wife and I begin this journey in a few weeks. Even if it arrives next Monday, I have travel plans for that weekend. I prefer not to wear it outside until we have the sizing dialed in perfectly so I am certain I can last several hours without needing an emergency room visit due to poor fit testing.
Realistically, we likely won’t try wearing it until Labor Day weekend at the earliest. I also want to ensure there is time to sand down any sharp plastic edges left from manufacturing.
Over the next couple of days, I plan to post about our discussions regarding this decision: her hesitations, my reactions, and how we are ensuring our motivations are correct.
For today, at least, my anxiety regarding the coming twelve months is manageable. (Refer to my ‘hello world’ thread for details on a specific situation involving my wife that she may eventually use chastity to manage over the next decade—particularly if she enjoys controlling my behavior.)