I’ve been quiet on here lately, locked up since 2016. I value my privacy highly but have decided to step out of the shadows and share more about how things are going for me, hoping to get some input from others in similar situations. Maybe I can offer something back too, seeing as there are newer members learning the ropes while I’ve been around a bit longer.
I’ve spent over 25 years married to an excellent woman. Our intimate life had its ups and downs, which is natural when careers develop and children grow up. Once our kids left home, my quieter desires grew louder — very loud. My subtle submission turned into clear orgasm control and denial, prompting me to admit I needed her to take charge in a Female Led Relationship (FLR). This led to a written pledge of obedience, then getting the Bon4Msmall device and handing over the key; we became 24/7 within just one month. Since I stay active physically, I wanted something that didn’t hinder my workouts much and wasn’t too noticeable, so we switched to the Prison Bird A273-small with an ergonomic back ring — it’s snug, firm, comfortable, and affordable! She found it odd at first but has grown quite fond of how it affects me. It seems to have mellowed out my Type-A personality, improved our dynamic, and even boosted her confidence. She enjoys all the oral attention now and is more open about deciding when I should be locked or unlocked.
Still, she isn’t as demanding as I’d like. I’m deeply submissive and offer up most of the housework willingly, but I want her to actively ask for more from me. While rules exist, they aren’t strictly enforced; occasional spankings happen, but having them more often would deepen my sense of submission. She holds the key, yet I feel a need for more teasing — a stronger, deliberate display of her control over daily life. When doubt creeps in, I worry she’s just letting me lock myself and playing along only when it suits her mood. (Of course, being locked 24/7 keeps the cage front-of-mind for the wearer far more than for the keeper, doesn’t it? How do I manage this without taking charge too much?)
I anticipated my submissive nature would deepen — that urge to submit is likely why I got locked in the first place — so that hasn’t surprised me. What has been truly unexpected is how my mental landscape and fantasies have evolved over weeks into years. With erections suppressed under metallic control, waiting for her needs or permission to be unlocked, my mind wanders freely. It feels like the cage has opened parts of my sex-brain I didn’t know existed, flooded with visions involving strapons, being shown off, panties, and even some bicurious curiosity.
Life is short at its core. I’m letting my thoughts go where they lead, trying to stay committed while keeping my wife involved in the conversation, despite it feeling a bit daunting. Ultimately, as long as I remain locked, there’s no turning back.