Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

Hi everyone! I’ve been away for a bit, unfortunately. My partner and I have spent more time sorting out what suits us best regarding not only chastity but also the other elements of an FLR. We’ve picked up some insights about one another. When he takes charge, he likes to plan ahead. As his domme, I prefer going with the flow. In our dynamic where he’s dominant and I’m submissive, he can be incredibly harsh on me, and I happily go along with it—it works perfectly. The reverse setup is a bit trickier though. He dreams of how strict I’ll be over time. I’m happy to let him serve me occasionally, enjoying short-term pleasures without always remembering to assert my control by locking him up in between. Yet even while satisfied with what I ask in the short term, looking at him—and myself—I realize this isn’t exactly what I desire most. I want to mold him as I please, keeping him on a string so he experiences a full range of pleasure and pain. But I can only achieve that if I earn his respect, which requires me to be a dedicated keyholder who sticks to her schedule. Yes, you might say it’s my right to dominate however I choose, and I know that’s true. Yes, I love having him please me when the mood strikes. But that isn’t everything I want. I want to possess his heart too. While I enjoy receiving pleasure from him, I don’t like seeing a lack of reverence, awe, or fear in his eyes while he gives it. Above all, I want to excite him—to scare and seduce him alternately. To do this, I need to raise my standards. So our plan is underway: a three-month “trial” for a permanent FLR. He will be denied throughout the whole period, with regular, well-scheduled chastity device training to help him get used to 24/7 wear and, more importantly, to make me stricter about enforcement. (We were disappointed by our previous Holy Trainer, so we ordered a custom Jailbird last week!) We’ll compromise to ensure this phase succeeds. I will do my best to stick to the schedule I’ve drafted and punish him fairly for any mistakes. In return, he will help maintain his denial by reminding me if I forget to lock him up or suggesting restraint/punishment when he becomes pushy. If I feel confident in my domination skills after three months, we’ll move into a proper FLR. This means keeping him denied indefinitely, getting him a PA piercing for even more security with the device, strategically limiting his access to my body so every glimpse and touch feels special, and generally showing no mercy. The fantasy of saving him as our prize stud, releasing him only once or twice a year, is something we both share. But fantasies don’t always match reality. If I’m not confident in my domination by the end of this period, we’ll return to being organic switches. Although we lose some permanence, we gain stability and guaranteed comfort. If we take that route, we will celebrate our trial’s final day—my birthday—by finally losing our PiV virginity together. Personally, I’m aiming to grow into my role, prove myself as a fierce mistress, and claim him as my true, permanent love slave when it’s all over. Even though we are switches, we lean toward femdom more often than not, and we’d like to go further. Fortunately, we win either way. Keeping the option to switch allows us to keep things fresh and avoid frustration. Plus, I can’t deny that we’re both eager to leave our somewhat prudish past behind and just do it already. XD Whatever happens, I’m looking forward to the next three months. Good luck to us! <3