Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

Strictly as a penalty this time… When my wife and I began our chastity journey, it aligned closely with me transitioning to living full-time as a woman. My life improved under the influence of chastity on both mood and focus, so she took charge completely. After nearly two years in the lockup, the changes appeared largely permanent, likely aided by the new estrogen circulating through my system. She decided I no longer required being locked up. That was about two years ago, and things have proceeded smoothly since then. We maintain a fully open marriage with several firm rules that allow us to preserve our bond without letting outside interactions disrupt it too much. One key rule is that she may sleep with anyone, while I am restricted to the female role and only men can penetrate me. I can also bottom for women who use a strap-on or simply want oral pleasure. This hasn’t caused problems because one of the significant changes after five-plus years on hormones (besides breast development) has been difficulty achieving erections; ED medication is often needed, and frankly, I have only gotten hard with my wife over the last couple of years despite others fondling me. I am comfortable with these rules and enjoy sucking cock and being fucked. When I orgasm from penetration, it feels much more like a female release than a male one, which often surprises my partners; especially since I can be multi-orgasmic this way. I love being touched and played with even without an erection, and some people find it fascinating to watch me spurt when I’m fucked or play with me as I writhe and moan. At a swinger’s party last Saturday, I was playing with one couple while my wife slept with one of her boyfriends. The husband had me lying on my back with my head hanging off the bed edge while he face-fucked me; his wife was working my ass, and I believed she intended to use a strap-on so her husband could watch her fuck me from above. It was an intense moment, and the woman playing definitely got a reaction from my cock, which is unusual. Unfortunately, the woman interpreted that reaction as an invitation to sit on me and rub herself against me. Just then, my wife walked in. To her, it looked like I was violating two of our few rules; I appeared ready to be inside a woman, and the act was bareback (which we strictly forbid). I wonder what she was thinking because I had made clear to her husband that oral sex is the only bare contact I permit (I know some might object, but I understand), and any other penetration requires a condom. However, I hadn’t discussed this with his wife yet. My wife interrupted us and said we needed to talk. She was upset that I seemed to be breaking the rules, particularly given how few there are. When I explained my perspective, she essentially dismissed it; I am responsible for following them regardless. You should also know that we rarely play together; my wife prefers one-on-one encounters while I enjoy parties, so it is rare for us to attend the same activity simultaneously. We live apart most of the time due to a business project. I see her roughly one week out of four, driving 500 miles just to spend that week with her. Thus, trust is vital in our marriage. This morning she announced she has decided to lock me back up for the foreseeable future. You might think this isn’t major, but I can still rub myself to an orgasm even without being hard; now, however, the only way I can climax is by being fucked. One psychological effect of being locked is that I tend toward submission. Usually not submissive (I am typically a bottom only for sex), many men at parties treat me as such. Most are polite when I say it doesn’t work for me, but they still propose it two or three times a week in person and online. My wife knows this part is the true punishment. After being locked up for a month or two, she expects me to accept submission from a dominant man. She also knows I will likely choose someone I trust (or potentially someone she selects). But she understands that I prefer control; while being treated as a BDSM toy and fuck object is a fantasy for many, it isn’t one of mine. So here I am locked up again in my custom Mature Metal device, which I thought was retired. Those butterflies in my stomach return knowing what the future holds.