DLinchastity Caged and Unsure

This first paragraph is from my first post in Hello World. Hello all, and thanks for letting me into the forum . I am not a bot just a human. I introduced chastity to my wife about 12 years ago, she gave it a try but never got into at all. It turned out that she had some medical problems, and not long after all sex together stopped. She was just in too much pain. So I have been self service for the past 10 years or so. That became something that had to be taken care of every day or least every other day. So i got the CB6000s out and put it on, could not take more than a day pinching chafing bad, tried everything nothing helped. Did not have that problem back when we played before. I ordered and got a Holy Trainer knock off, much better. Locked 18 days now 20 days since last orgasm . My start out plan was for a week, the week came but I did not, maybe two weeks then, now thinking maybe a month. Right now I am having a love hate relationship with this device. Thanks for giving me a place to vent. Not sure how far back you all expect one to go to start the journey. I will try to not be too boring, I am not a good writer or good story teller . I started with sex at a young age with an older girl that had me give her oral then introduced me to intercourse, but not to climax. So I grew up chasing women with oral with the goal of intercourse and returning for more, worked most of the time. Life went on got married had kids got de-voiced, had tried and enjoyed every kink and fetish play I could think of or find. I have always been more dom than sub, but believe women have the real control. My dad said the women own half the money and all of the pussy so they control the rest of the money. Got old and remarried great sex for a time, we got old she got hurt and sex went away, My sex life became self service. After a time I have become a boring sex partner. Looking for ways to break the cycle: I have to jack off to start my day or I can’t get anything done. Back to the start of this lockup, in my mind the plan was put it on for a week that should improve my self play when I get out. That week passed by quick I had been busy so I changed to two weeks, I read some place if your lockee ask for a week lock him for two. Made it to two weeks and moved the bar to three. Why not go for the month, well a couple days later it was getting to me so masturbation time came . It went real fast not even all the way hard, and not what I had expected. I was thinking that being more time between would be something better, you know? Not much fun or much relief to it, did not put the cage back on,not sure this going to do me any good. That night bed time I missed my little buddy and put my device back on. Not sure what I am doing now. Maybe doing this by myself there is not enough tease and denial going on. I now do like the feel of the tube on my dick ever present tube is full of me 98% of the time. So for now I am caged for how long or what to do till my next release,