How strange is my quick plunge into chastity?

Everything happened quickly. In just a few short weeks, I shifted from wanting to be emotionally submissive to my future wife all the way up to wanting to stay locked for life, with release coming only if and when she decides. I suppose I’m fortunate because my keyholder cares more about me and my mental state; she doesn’t want me suffering. Last night, without any prompt from me at all, she asked if I wanted to unlock and masturbate (she had suggested the same thing two days earlier). This time around, although I didn’t say no outright, I mentioned that “I wasn’t planning on asking today.” She let it rest there. I enjoy the control more than the denial itself, yet I felt a bit disappointed she brought up the question so soon after our last discussion. I like to call her my sweet but formidable dom. My penis has guided me through some dark places. I’ve always been looking for a woman who matches the image in my head. My past kinks, history, and general way of thinking usually make it hard.. But somehow she appeared at my door. I view her as an opportunity to focus on what I wanted most all along.. Love and affection. Chastity feels like my path toward ensuring a new direction in life.. One where I’m not the one constantly chasing after things that often lead me into trouble, depression, or being taken advantage of.. The other side is that I have such deep feelings for her that I want to… Become less “me”.. And become more “part of her”… If that makes sense sometimes it’s tough to put into words. I want her to hold the reins.. It feels like she loves me as long as she agrees to manage large parts of my life. Despite currently being forced to top from the bottom, this turns me on immensely. She knows how I feel about who I was before.. Depressed, lonely, indifferent to my own existence, and foolishly hedonistic… She thinks part of why I want to be locked up is because I dislike my penis.. Which seems both cute and sad simultaneously. But I told her that what I hate isn’t the organ itself but rather the person I feel like without her; I’ve just redirected that frustration toward my penis because in many ways, it feels like where my base desires come from, particularly the negative ones. I also explained to her that my submission and chastity are symbols of how much I love and need her. Anyway.. I expressed to her my desire to remain locked up, foregoing orgasm for life if she doesn’t want to be with me. And I would do it.. To keep my energy focused on at least the idea of her, rather than drifting backward… Thank goodness she isn’t leaving me. So.. Here I am. Locked. Content about it. Even though I’ve only been interested in cages for about two weeks and locked up for one month.. I see this as the rest of my life.