Understanding the Practice of Edging and Ruined Climaxes

I first encountered the concept of a “ruined orgasm” in mid-June this year. I’ve been practicing edging for more years than I care to admit. In the discussion about Ruined Orgasms, there was talk of teasing your KH and stopping just before any fluid starts squirting out. To me, that sounds like standard Edging rather than a truly Ruined one. Though, honestly, good edging is definitely worth it! Specifically, edging involves stimulating your partner until they are on the verge of climax, then maintaining enough stimulation to keep them right at that peak. If you stimulate too little, their arousal drops; if you do too much, an orgasm occurs (which can be ruined if used as a last resort). The skill lies in keeping it balanced. You can use any method—manual, oral, with vibrators or electro-stim for the brave, or other toys. It’s possible even during penetrative sex, though harder to manage. You might combine it with light bondage or not; bonding stops your partner from pushing themselves over the edge when stimulation pauses due to frustration, while lack of bonding works because they often don’t want to move lest they lose the feeling. This applies to both men and women and doesn’t require being in chastity, though MC helps significantly. With MC, you can incorporate it into T&D for him or offer it as part of the attentive care chaste males give their KH. Essentially, stimulate until close to climax, then hold them there.:twisted: The exact technique depends on practice with your specific partner; it suits long-term relationships better than a one-night stand. Different methods work differently for different people. It works well initially but improves as you get more observant of what your partner does when nearing the edge. A helpful trick is if the person says a single-syllable word right before they are certain to cum—in one video, that word was “Hey”. It boosts intimacy because doing it requires focused attention on your partner, which tends to increase feelings of love (IMX). For me, nothing confirms I’m doing it correctly like seeing Anymouse’s eyes roll back in his head. Watching him squirm 30 degrees off-center on the chaise lounge—secured by fuzzy “seat belts” that keep him from falling or help push him toward a full climax—is incredibly pleasing to watch, though distinct from when he stimulates me directly. There’s no theoretical cap on duration. You can continue until one or both are exhausted, for a set time, until someone needs food/water/bathroom, or until some other event occurs (bedtime, sunrise, neighbors complaining about noise, TV shows starting, etc.). As I’m known to do, here is a book recommendation: ESO: How You and Your Lover Can Give Each Other Hours of Extended Sexual Orgasm by Alan P. and Donna J. Brauer. It’s divided into two sections: one for pleasing men and one for women.