what am I seeking out of all this?

I suspect many of you have felt this way too, so I’ll wander a bit into my thoughts. About two years back, I picked up a cb6k. It was fun to experiment with; the sensation and focus it provided were great. Eventually, I introduced it to my fiancée, who took quite an interest. She held onto the keys for a while, things went smoothly, we used it a few times each month without any big drama. Sleeping in it remained tricky though—the classic issue many of you know well. The pregnancy arrived and personally, I shied away from sex entirely. It just felt incorrect; she was carrying our baby and I didn’t want to jeopardize that by risking anything. Now the little one is here, and we’re ready to resume normal sexual activity naturally enough. The catch? I’ve gotten rather accustomed to relieving myself on my own. Even though I don’t particularly crave it, I still do. This makes me think a chastity belt could be useful right now. The downside: this requires owning up to what’s happening and having her hold the keys from day one. Am I jumping back into that for an indefinite period? It sounds like a wonderful fantasy in theory, but practically, I’m unsure if I can manage it. Cycling is my passion, and wearing a cb has always been problematic when riding. So today marks a small test run: I’ve locked myself up again. Perhaps just until lunchtime, but it’s a solid beginning. Before I bring this up with her properly, I’d value your thoughts on the matter. The logical step is conversation, which we’ll definitely do, and that works for me. But what exactly am I seeking out of all this?