Hi everyone, I just wanted to share my experience here. I am 22, and my lovely girlfriend is 21. We have been together for nearly three years and enjoy a very close bond, having reached many milestones (like losing our virginities). Our love is genuine; while not flawless, it has shown resilience against challenges that often cause other couples to split (including sexual issues - without giving too much away, we were initially what you could call “incompatible”). My sex life took a slight hit because I struggled with self-control and masturbated frequently, but she is very understanding (and somewhat subby), so it wasn’t really a problem. I became interested in the world of male chastity about two or three months ago, though I was hesitant to tell her at first because I wondered if it would benefit our relationship. Even if she came to appreciate the control, power, and attention that come with female keyholding and male chastity, she would still miss having intercourse a lot (since we moved past being “incompatible”, she started really enjoying sex;)). So I hoped it was just a passing trend. Well, it wasn’t.:D I stopped masturbating to my other fetishes and focused almost entirely on chastity captions and similar content; you know what I mean. And yes, I am well aware that they don’t depict daily life in chastity accurately, but they convey a core concept that turns me on greatly. I tried bringing it up with her by casually mentioning the idea a few times. She wasn’t particularly keen at first. Or rather, she just didn’t quite get it. And I understand why; a guy in his twenties talking about NOT ejaculating is somewhat counterintuitive. So I wrote down what I see as the benefits to clarify things for myself and so I could explain them to her, showing that it was slightly more complex than she initially thought. I also gave her some time to adjust to the idea of her man taking on a submissive role temporarily. Because we feel our relationship is unique, we made an agreement long ago to simply share our different fetishes and kinks with each other. Many relationships suffer because of poor communication. We didn’t want that; although she doesn’t always appreciate or understand my specific interests, she has done her absolute best to embrace them and experience them with me as much as possible (latex being one example, which I have a strong fetish for). This is partly why she was “open” to the chastity idea. I began by stopping masturbation, or rather starting to edge myself because she would be over. It made our sex far more enjoyable because she didn’t have to wait so long for me, which she really liked. Also, my orgasms became more intense, and I looked forward to sex much more. She realized, I think, that keeping a guy from masturbating three times a day has its benefits, which aligns well with the chastity concept. I set myself the goal of not ejaculating without her permission at all, which is possible but requires self-control (especially during that special week every month). I used to edge repeatedly, which led to a few accidental orgasms. Ruined ones, yes, but they still happened. In short, there were many aspects that made me think having her as my keyholder wouldn’t be such a bad idea, especially considering she had grown to like the concept. I ordered a plastic cage and told her about it; she accepted it, but when it arrived, it felt just slightly “too real” for her, I think. However, since the device is made of sh*t, she was spared from being too bothered. After this little episode, I started a thread here on CM so you could help me find the right device. She knew about it and when I told her I wanted to order one, she said, “I also want you to order one.” This boosted my hopes well; although I was never 100% sure about her as my keyholder, it certainly seemed possible. During a romantic evening a few weeks back, she joked about allowing me only two ruined orgasms per month and full ones only on special holidays like Christmas, Easter, my birthday, etc… She was joking, but boy did I get an erection;) As this fits my fantasy quite well. Which she knows, and she said it just to tease me; if it’s a good way to practice chastity in real everyday life, we shall see. I know some of you guys live like this or even stricter, but being only 22, I can’t help thinking that might be too much for me. I started going without orgasm simply because I liked the feeling. At first, there was still a lot of edging involved, but I mostly stopped that too, because I wanted her to be the only one capable of awakening those feelings in me. I am now a full week without ejaculation, which would have been pretty unthinkable six months ago, and I like it a lot!:) I get butterflies in my stomach (and lower down) every time we kiss, and I look forward to spending time with her, which didn’t happen as much before. We are having a romantic evening today, but I think I made it clear that I don’t want to cum (I don’t want to ruin the orgasm-free week). What makes me really horny is that from tomorrow on she will decide if and when I ejaculate in the future. Long story short, I just ordered an A080 device from a local dealer and it arrives tomorrow. We will see how far I actually want this and how far she will take it ^^ Things I am unsure about:
- Her pleasure currently depends on penetrative sex, which will be quite difficult with a cage in place. Joking aside, I haven’t yet found a way to please her without my little guy; that means as a good boyfriend, I would have to unlock every time she wants an orgasm (which might make chastity rather pointless). I hope I can do it via oral sex in the future, but I am not sure this will satisfy her in the same way.
- I think I enjoy chastity play, but only as long as it remains play. I would hate to see our relationship being seriously manipulated by it, for example if she realizes she can no longer take me as a man seriously or something similar. Cuckolding is definitely not for me. [/Wall of text] I hope this is readable and not too boring; English isn’t my first language.