Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

As time has passed, I’ve realized that being locked up around the clock is something I truly need for the long haul. My wife understands this and insists on No-vember, saying that staying in chastity is exactly where I belong. It finally feels real. I wanted to hear your thoughts on Coming Out. Reaching that realization of needing 24/7 lockup and then sharing it—first with ourselves, then our wives—is a pivotal, often surprising moment. For an alpha male who seems strong outwardly, admitting he is submissive inwardly can be confusing and difficult. Sharing this intimacy with your wife changes the marriage dynamic forever. I imagine it feels much like a man realizing he’s gay; first to himself, then to others. How did you experience it? How long did it take for you to accept that feeling, and then to admit it? Outside, I’m very alpha: successful, financially stable with a good family and marriage. Yet for over ten years, I’ve mostly masturbated while thinking about femdom—stories of men being gently dominated by their wives’ needs and discipline. Through this persistent habit, those thoughts merged into my core identity. When I found chastity cages a decade or so ago, everything clicked. Like many others, I think I was masturbating to the idea of wearing one: having my erection managed and avoiding self-pleasure. Around the same time I discovered cages, my wife and I began playing with orgasm management and denial games intermittently for ten to twelve years before they became a regular part of our lives. Initially, these felt vanilla enough that she accepted them without issue. But as sessions grew longer, I confessed that I enjoyed her control and wanted more of it. That admission was tough on its own: how would my wife react when the rock of their family—the dominant husband—confessed he is really a submissive boy who needs her to manage his erection, stop him from masturbating, spank him, and train him into a better partner? Then came the purchase. After days of hesitation, I clicked buy for my first cage. The excitement upon its arrival, the struggle to put it on while swollen, and that near-climax when I heard the lock click confirmed this was right. So one night, after years of contemplation and gradual, vanilla-tinged confessions about wanting her control over his release, I finally showed my wife the cage. I confessed, told her I wanted her to hold the key. I trusted her with that intimacy. I came out. How did you come out?