Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

I'm in a more traditional, vanilla marriage; that is, I'm not submissive, my wife Mrs Edge isn't a domme, and except for the chastity device, we have a fairly typical marriage, so not sure if this will apply to you. That said, we hadn't agreed last year to go long term. That is, I'd been in and out of chastity for some time previous to last March, and the length of time was always variable, although it tended to be weeks to months because we often play off each other. Last year, Mrs Edge had me use a Vixskin "replacement" strapon (it's very, very lifelike, and the model we use is pretty similar to my own size and shape). As the months ticked over, it became clear that, while never saying it was going to be a year, that's what she was shooting for. Last month when I mentioned the year was coming around, she told me that she didn't plan to unlock me, and that it was going to go on for "at least another year." So, I'm close to the anniversary now, and have been reflecting on this. For us, it's been an exciting and enjoyable time. I didn't ask for it, but seeing her get so excited and aroused keeps me aroused, which makes enduring the lockup much easier. Mrs Edge isn't committing to any time period, but the both of us have an agreement that we will keep going as long as it's fun for the both of us. Long term chastity is exciting to think about, but in practice it can be boring. We have sex a couple times a week, but sometimes holidays or social events will prevent that. We're both coming off some nasty cold that was going around and we hadn't been intimate in weeks. If you're used to wanking in the middle of the night to fall back asleep, that route is now cut off (Zzquil helps). And there's still the daily maintenance (I lube with lotion in the morning and clean up in a hot shower at night). Once a month I get to remove it for a deeper cleaning, inspection, and a shave/trim, but that's two minutes in the shower. It's down to a routine, and routines aren't usually sexy. I can tell you that I'm still aroused most of the time, and even though I know I'll be wearing my "replacement," I still look forward to making love just as much (and Mrs Edge may look forward to it even more, which could be slightly disconcerting). Again, though, the idea is that no matter how long she wants to take it (in the heat of the moment she says "forever," but who really knows) we're both enjoying it, which is key. And again, we're an otherwise traditional, vanilla couple. You and your partner may have a different relationship that will impact your perceptions and outlook.

Thanks Tom. The chastity part is already a part of our lifestyle. Currently I have very regular access to sex(although she is planning to limit that) and I've been having orgasms anywhere from once every week or two, to the longest being over 30 days a couple of times. This thought of hers to potentially cancel future orgasms has come pretty suddenly though.

> rforMissM said: > How much have you missed those explosive orgasms? How have you adapted to the loss of them? > Click to expand... Mrs Edge and I have been at this for *coff coff* years, so this isn't my first go-around with long term denial. Over the years I've managed to cope by somehow (and I can't tell you how) becoming emotionally satisfied by making *her* satisfied. I've long since managed to be able to sleep through the night in a device, and to enjoy the intense arousal that one gets after making love with no orgasm. At some point, I can look at Mrs Edge laying back like a quivering pile of Jello, and even though I'm still aroused, I manage to feel, I guess, satisfaction in a job well done. I've sublimated the arousal into satisfaction and enjoyment. Not sure how helpful this is, but that's how it works for me.

No doubt I would need to derive even more happiness from her pleasure than I already do. I've always had some wiring this way. For example, I find discovering a wet pussy incredibly gratifying. I love knowing I'm responsible for that kind of excitement and certainly love when I can help provide her with an orgasm. I feel like I'm still a long way away from that all being enough to completely forget my own desire for an orgasm, but I suppose if I find myself in a position where that's no longer an option, I'll have to further adapt my mindset.

It has its ups and downs. I didn’t really realize it until I read this thread and stopped to think about it, but it was last February the last time I was allowed an orgasm. Wow, time flies. Anyway, back to the subject; it is sometimes very, very hard and then there are other times when I really don’t even think about it. Today is actually a hard day. All day since I woke up I have been craving an erection and orgasm. I saw my wife getting dressed today, and seeing her with her underwear off made me miss the feeling of being in her vagina so bad. She saw me staring and grinned mischievously just to rub it in. But there are times when the feelings aren’t so intense. And there are the occasional random emissions that bring relief for a day or two, though they are never very pleasant and certainly not satisfying. Just a feeling of relief like emptying your bladder. Not having a full prostate can be nice. Really the hardest times are when the wife doesn’t want to do anything. My only real sexual pleasure aside from the teasing she gives me is pleasuring her and enjoying her orgasms. When she doesn’t want to do anything it can be very hard to be bursting with desire and no outlet.

When my old friend became my KH and took over my self-locking. Some promises were made and eventually a contract that we have never felt the need to finish. We never discussed how long my period or subsequent periods of denial would be. Through mutual agreement. I promised I would not try and cum without permission and would take whatever steps possible to prevent an 'accident' should the need arise Towards that end have promised at all times unless otherwise directed to wear a chastity device I promised never to ask to be allowed an orgasm I promised never to ask when my next orgasm would be She promised she would never reveal when my next orgasm would be I have promised never to ask if my denial has become permanent She promised that If or When permanent my denial begins if it hasn't already she will not tell me. I will have to work it out for myself. Specifically and perhaps most significantly If at any time I am allowed out of the device I have promised to put it back on if or whenever she tells me to. there are other mutually agreed details too but not relevant to the OP. So although we never discussed the duration of this first denial a little under 2 years I may have already started permanent denial I have no way of knowing. If I have not then there is nothing further to mention But in that sense I; *may have been taken in that direction, rather than initiated it.* If I have begun permanent denial then I can see some of the potential the advantages and or if you prefer the positives of that...for me. It will certainly be a learning experience for me. I have felt certain submissive feelings arise that were not there previously I am not averse to them and we have discussed seeing how those might develop. Am I ready for permanent denial? I do enjoy the head-fuck that I want and sometimes that I need to experience an erection or orgasm but much prefer the feelings generated by not being allowed them and being prevented from doing so. I enjoy the frustrated attempts at getting erect in the cage knowing nothing will come of it. I enjoy feeling horny almost any time I am not fully preoccupied knowing nothing will come of that either. My Lady enjoys my situation and being in control of it. In turn I enjoy being locked denied and controlled by someone that wants to do those things for her own pleasure. In short I have not had an explosive or any orgasm for a long time and find that I recall what they are like I do miss them and sometimes feel I need one but I might be close to being ready to say I don't want another. I can without reservation say I would much rather at anytime give my partner pleasure sexual or otherwise than seek my own, but that is perhaps becuase it does give me pleasure to do that.