Female led relationships discussion

I spent several years in a deep FMLR. We held a Collaring Ceremony, and I still wear the slave tattoo on my hip that belongs to my Mistress. Although life circumstances have shifted, we remain incredibly close. I get along well with her husband and frequently babysit their toddler, whom I absolutely adore (not for any reasons you might be thinking! I cherish and protect her like she’s mine). When my Mistress announced she was pregnant, I felt a mix of joy for her and personal sorrow. The sadness came from knowing that while it had to happen as an expectant parent would understand, I knew I’d no longer be the top priority. We haven’t done any BDSM activities since then, but I remain part of their small family unit. After years away from the lifestyle, old cravings resurfaced. I missed being locked and wanted that BDSM play again. So, I started wearing my chastity device once more to feel that control returning. However, without anyone actually holding power over me, it felt a bit hollow. I began seeking out a professional Domme who could fulfill my needs and with whom I could build an ongoing arrangement. After researching and emailing the two candidates I thought best fit my requirements, I met the first one but left feeling uninspired. Still wanting more, I reached out to the second one about a month later. We exchanged emails, noting her playful humor and sadistic edge. We went through standard pre-meeting details and expectations in our correspondence and quickly agreed to meet up. One detail I shared was my wish to arrive at our meeting locked in chastity and hand over the keys. She agreed, though I wasn’t sure what would actually happen when we met. She picked me up for a drink at an arranged public spot. Clearly a natural Dominant, she looked even more stunning in person than her online gallery suggested. We swapped war stories and laughed before I reached into my briefcase to pull out the keys to my securely locked device. Seeing them, her face lit up as she mentioned how much she loves collecting keys. She gave a sly smile while attaching them to her necklace—a hint at what was coming. We walked the short distance to her dungeon where she ordered me to get ready before stepping out of the play space. When she returned, I wore only the device, which I now couldn’t remove even if I tried. Her natural Dominance, beauty, and delicious sadistic streak captivated me, awakening feelings that had been dormant for years. This was remarkable because she followed no script; we engaged in none of the activities I’d said interested me most. To be fair, I had told her at the bar that my joy came from pleasing a Dominant, with my personal desires being secondary. She took this to heart and I loved it! Her dominance pushed me into such deep sub space that I felt like I was flying. I remember lying face-up on her floor while tied up. She dangled her key-bearing necklace in front of my eyes and playfully declared: “I am not going to unlock you.” A true tease and denial! It wasn’t what I expected, but as a well-trained slave, I accepted the Mistress’s decision. As I left, still riding high from our session, she jokingly told me she was keeping me locked indefinitely. Again, I accepted her choice, returned her wry smile, and walked out into the night still secured. A few days passed without news. Then on a Saturday evening, I received a text with photos showing her wearing my device’s key around her neck for all to see. This thrilled me, but she also asked if I was free in a few days since she considered unlocking me. I definitely had time off, especially for the prospect of being unlocked. We met at the set time and once again enjoyed our time in her dungeon, though she didn’t unlock me right away. I wondered if this was another bit of sadistic T&D, but true to her word, she did finally release me. That night, as I left her presence still free, she smiled and said: “Oh, and I am keeping your keys.” On a later visit, she reminded me that the keys were hers and told me to expect a text ordering me to lock up for her at any moment. Some time after that, while cleaning her bathroom, she asked if I had my chastity device with me, noting that she hadn’t explicitly asked me to pack it. I informed her that I always packed it when planning to see her in case she wanted to put me into lockdown. Impressed by my readiness, she locked me before I left and arranged for us to meet again in a few days. When we met next time, she unlocked me just before entering the dungeon. We played a game where a die determined which sadistic act I would endure and how long. After enduring her bare hand, a flogger, four different paddles, and at least two canes, Domina (the name I now use for her) decided it was time to add sensory deprivation and bondage. Lying face-up on her carpeted floor, bound to the spanking bench, she teased me. She applied nipple clamps and bid me to kiss the soles of her shoes and suck on their heels. During this blissful torture, I felt that this was what my entire life had been fantasizing about. The chemicals released during our play took over my brain, bringing an amazing sense of peace. At some point, Domina asked permission to take a few snapshots. Wearing a mask with no identifying marks visible, I agreed. During our next text exchange, I asked if she would be kind enough to forward those photos since they felt special to me. I told her I’d explain why when we met again. She sent the pictures and expressed interest in hearing my reasoning. Deciding that sometimes one must just act decisively rather than live with regrets, I took a deep breath and typed out a message along these lines: Those photos are special because it was at that moment I realized I belong to you, Domina. If that pleases you, of course. I knew our relationship would shift in some way once the message went through. A few minutes passed with no reply, so I assumed I might have messed up. Then a few more minutes elapsed and I became certain it had been a mistake. After another few moments—which felt like an eternity—my phone chimed with Domina’s text alert. Fearful of the worst, I took a deep breath and looked. Her return message said she had become very emotional reading my original note and that it pleased her greatly! I had sensed I belonged at her feet, and not only did Domina agree, but she was happy about it! I saw Domina that evening; she looked radiant, even more stunning than usual. I brought drinks and snacks for her visiting friends while preparing the food and pouring champagne. Watching her face, I noticed a look of pure happiness. I don’t know exactly where we are going next, but I want to enjoy every minute being locked by such a wonderful Domina.