Sometimes folks view the experiences shared here as mistreatment, coldness, or meanness. It can be that way, but keep in mind this lifestyle isn’t just a matter of household chores; it includes sexual elements centered on power dynamics and their absence.
If you think anyone who enjoys causing pain should be dismissed, remember that intent matters more than the action itself. When she ties me to the bed, teases me, then slaps my testicles, it feels different from her walking over and hitting them randomly. The situation changes things. Her commanding I bend over because she’s going to punish my naughtiness differs from simply deciding on a whim that you deserve a hit.
Withholding orgasms while keeping me near the edge of submissive headspace so we both feel good doesn’t make her selfish, nor is it equivalent to ignoring what I need.
Above all, partners talk about what excites them or what they want to attempt before starting and right after to gauge their feelings.
I’m puzzled how you can join this site as a member yet know so little about power exchange dynamics.
Do people here really believe that discipline means your partner is being cruel? Do others feel that having orgasms withheld is petty?