Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

Hi all, a quick question… The longer I spend around chastity sites (mostly here, ChastiKey and some Googling) the more it feels like there are two main chastity fantasies. One is held by men who dream of a strong female (or the cute girl next door type having “found” the key) coming to lock them up and this is built not only on the sexiness of denial but also on the fact that overall the woman must really desire the man in order to do it. So in a sense this kind of a reverse power-play erotic fantasy for the male. On the other hand many of the ladies on this site (especially) seem to shun overt sexual attention and don’t want to see a man’s intimate parts semi-literally shoved in their faces… (and I don’t blame them) everytime they open a chat message … instead they want to see a man who will keep himself presentable and tidy, who is prepared to submit his orgasms but overall this is just a small token of their greater wants. They want somebody who will do their jobs for them and tasks as requested, or do nice things, or they can send out on a silly task - just because they can. The fantasy is the man choosing to submit everything to the/his woman and then following it through repercussions and all. The male fantasy (in this case, there are obviously different ones) is there for one of being dominated and needing the female to act sexily around them to achieve this. The core female one though demands that the man downplays his sexuality in order to honour his partner - except when she wishes to mess (sorry, read: encourage) him - and instead has him dutifully being her slave by choice. I realise that these are broad brushstrokes and that many men and women on here and elsewhere will have different fantasies. But I wondered if it would chime a chord with anyone here and perhaps explain why men can sometimes overstep the boundaries so badly on here when they talk to women - as they expect them all to be wearing skin tight leather and carrying whips. Instead most of the denied men on here probably know you don’t need your partner to be carrying a whip when they can simply add “a few more days” on a whim. Just leaving this here for comments or thoughts. I’m curious what others think.