Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

This is a tough one. Every couple is different... the best thing is for you to talk about it honestly... preferably when he's not crawling-the-walls-horny. Good communication is key; without that things tend to go wrong. A few ideas/suggestions: 1] The sub may be begging just hoping that you will say no. It sounds weird but it may well be true. 2] As KH, you need to realize that he wants you to be strict. When you cave in, he gets disappointed. Ask him about it afterwards and you'll see. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind... 3] Do you enjoy his begging and puppy dog thing? If yes, keep doing what you're doing. If no, add one day when he bugs you by begging. Double the confinement period each time he buggs you. By the time he's getting an extra week or two for bugging you, it will stop! This only works if the punishment period is credible. The best way to make it credible: never cave in to pleading demands. 4] Add one day for any time he asks to be unlocked and you say no. This will make him think and evaluate your mood before asking. 5] Regular feedback. Have him email you weekly or monthly: what did KH do that he liked best? 6] Introduce a delay, e.g., freeze the key in a big block of ice, or keep it in a place that you can only reach the next day. That way you can't give in during a moment of weakness. Or buy a "kitchensafe" so the lockup period is fixed in stone. 7] If you want to get really serious, do a one-time long-term lockup to really break his spirit. 3 months would do it, maybe even one month would do it if you're both in college! 8] If you have a close friend with whom you can share the secret, require him to have permission from both of you to be unlocked. 9] Calming him down... cold showers can work well. Or ice. -droog