The Person I am turning thirty-three soon enough, married for eleven years now and residing in an urban area that keeps expanding. I am not quite a family man yet, but I hope to become one shortly if the stars align perfectly for us to conceive.
The background: Back as a young teen, I never pictured myself settling down with someone long-term. I was always the unpopular kid at school who nobody wanted around. Because of this, I developed an unhealthy reliance on masturbation for sexual relief. Even though I met my wife when I was eighteen, breaking that habit proved impossible. To this day, I still use self-pleasure as a quick fix for boring or stressful moments. While many argue it is healthy to do so, I feel my dependence has become unhealthy. Since I lack the ability to control myself consistently—often submitting to my urges—I have decided to invest in some mechanical help to suppress those urges. I know BDSM well enough. I have always—and I truly mean ‘always’—enjoyed being tied up and restrained. My wife and I have enjoyed restraining each other for fun over the years, and I even tried introducing a D/S dynamic into our marriage, though it didn’t quite work out. Although we live as equals in our marriage, I still crave her exerting some control over me. We have found that chastity not only helps manage my urges but also gives me what I want while keeping her comfortable with the arrangement.
The belt. After years of looking at expensive belts and wondering how I could ever justify buying one like them, I finally found a budget-friendly option that promises similar performance for just a fraction of the cost. It is made of stainless steel with a silicone rubber insert. It features an adjustable waist so it can tighten as I lose weight during my challenge. The front shield flares out to prevent easy slipping from the sides and includes a metal tube inside to keep the penis away from wandering fingers. The back consists of a single steel strip that goes between the buttocks, with a hole for defecation. I found the original tube didn’t sit high enough for me, so we modified the belt slightly to improve comfort. We purchased some acrylic tubing which should stay clean and last long, using specialized glue to attach it to the top of the steel tube. This prevents accidental pulling out when I sit down. The rubber edging also caused a bit of trouble initially. A short-term fix involved using wire cable tie holds them in place against the metal. They aren’t perfect but don’t cause too much irritation, so they will stay until we find a more suitable method.
The blog: Although I have only been belted for three days now (before realizing it was hurting due to poor setup), I have some idea of what to expect. Toilet breaks, showering, sleeping, and living while wearing the belt have all occurred; however, it will take considerable time before anything feels completely normal. In my view, the seventy or so hours spent belted served as a dress rehearsal. What follows is the real deal. I will log my thoughts, experiences, and feelings as I discover what losing total control over one’s sexuality entails. It would be untrue to say I am not slightly afraid of the journey ahead, but I have likely been a slave to my sexual urges for about twenty years. In all that time, I never went longer than 48-50 hours without being able to orgasm. The idea of remaining subservient to those urges—an uncontrollable masturbation addict forever—seems far more terrifying than letting someone else decide what I can do and when. In my opinion, I had many chances to prove myself responsible with a penis and failed every time. If I don’t lock it away and give up the key, I will end up doing something really irresponsible with it and jeopardize my marriage. I don’t want that outcome. So I am in this for the long haul, intending to make it last the rest of my life. I hope to join many established members on this forum who say their belt or cage has become such a part of them that not wearing one makes them feel incomplete. Thank you for reading my story. If you continue doing so, I would welcome any advice or support you think might help me. If anything I share proves helpful to anyone else, please let me know. Knowing what information helps others allows me to focus on those areas in future posts. If there are questions or requests, please get in touch and I will do my best to see what can be done. Finding good, reliable information about this lifestyle can sometimes be incredibly difficult. The forums here at ‘the community’ are a great step toward making this tricky subject more accessible, and I would very much like to become part of that knowledge base to help others who might consider taking a similar path. Regards, Stargazer.