The more I learn about chastity, the less it seems to fit who I really am. My wife and I lean toward what I’d describe as tease and denial. While I go a few days without climaxing, she teases me throughout the week and takes her orgasms whenever she pleases. We don’t both crave long-term locking because we believe sex is about maximizing intense climaxes. For me, chastity simply builds up my desire so that when release comes—usually one or two days a week—it feels earned. There’s no cap on how many times I can climax in a day, so over the weekend I might have several, then hold out until the next weekend or perhaps midweek.
I don’t see why anyone would want to stay locked without climaxing for long stretches; in my experience, not many people actually desire it or can manage it. Few wish to remain chaste for extended periods, and friends of mine who made chastity vows found them broken often enough. I get the appeal of wanting a climax but being unable to take one yet, but I don’t find that state nearly as enjoyable as a mind-blowing, muscle-tightening climax with someone you love. The benefit is repetition—you can do it again when needed. So for us, chastity play is just that: part of our sexual game used either to heighten the intensity of climaxes or keep me on edge for a few days. It’s never been the end goal.
So I’m questioning whether I even consider myself into chastity. Some things here don’t match what I do, nor what anyone in my forty years has done. I knew many men who locked up to prevent masturbation or delay their climax until once a week; for them, the climax was always the prize, and they’d be unhappy if it took too long.:) This feels like a completely different world to me. Like many forums, some of this content is exaggerated or reflects an online fantasy life. If you disagree, I’ve got a bridge in New York for sale!:) It’s not wrong; it’s just hard to tell if the guy claiming he never releases is sincere or just trying to appear dominant. Sometimes I feel like everyone’s penises are bigger, but really, it’s about time spent locked up.
Despite my uncertainty about what to believe in this forum and others focused on chastity, I wonder if I’m truly into it, similar to how a woman who enjoys light spanking might be considered part of the BDSM world. Essentially, chastity isn’t my main goal but rather a fun short-term activity that boosts my experience. I consider myself part of the broader kink community, and chastity is just one small piece of it. What do you all think?