My situation is a bit unique compared to the usual cases. For the first 38 of our 41 years together, my wife and I maintained a permanent threesome with her girlfriend who was also married. We never really got a straight answer from her g/f about why she didn’t mind that he allowed her to have sex with us and stay over for weeks on end. She kept her marriage distinct from our trio dynamic. We suspected he liked cuckolding or might be bi, but all we heard was their “don’t ask, don’t tell” arrangement and his certainty that he knew what was happening. He probably did know because I once caught them making out while he was in the house; at the same time, my wife started undressing him. We thought about bringing him into our fun, but instead, he panicked and told her g/f he wanted to leave.
Years went by before we saw him again, and next time around, he joined us on a trip to Vegas. He gambled day and night, only insisting that his wife join him for dinner (with us there) and return to their room once she was finished with us. It was quite odd, but as the saying goes, don’t fix what isn’t broken.
She is also one of the few naturally dominant women I’ve met. Many women act dominant during BDSM play but remain submissive in daily life; I am more like her opposite. A recurring theme was her desire to prove that I belonged to her. She would leave marks on me and cause enough pain so that when she returned home, I wouldn’t feel much of a pull toward my wife. Over the years, this pattern continued as she seized every chance to demonstrate to my wife just how degraded and perverted I had become. My wife would sit in a chair and watch while her friend abused me or made me do degrading things. Eventually, she announced that I was no longer allowed to have intercourse with my wife—only with her, since she owned me. This suited my wife well; she has bad hips and joints and never loved intercourse much anyway, so she agreed readily. From then on, I could only give oral sex if asked.
This dynamic lasted for the last five years of our threesome era, gradually reducing how often I climaxed while the women indulged whenever they pleased. Usually, I got a hand job or was permitted to masturbate once a week amidst their sexual teasing. Fast forward three years ago: my wife and I moved, and our g/f followed suit, even putting down a deposit on a house nearby. However, he lost all his money from selling his business due to options trading in the stock market, forcing him back into work just like our g/f did. Since they were licensed professionals only recognized in their home state, they had to stay put.
Before we left for good, she asked that we avoid intercourse as a reminder of her presence; we could resume it when she visits every two or three years. Given that I was already accustomed to no intercourse (preferring oral), just like my wife whose hip issues were worsening, agreeing wasn’t hard. However, during her most recent visit, she promised me intercourse but stopped before I could finish on the last night, reminding me that she had promised sex, not release. So it has been a long time since I finally came inside.
This denial of intercourse fits into our broader chastity play perfectly; we view all our sexual fetishes as part of life’s play because we have real lives outside the bedroom. Now, I am denied both orgasm and intercourse on special occasions or if my wife is sufficiently excited by my moans and writhing during her teasing—I get oral sex instead. Most times, I achieve an manual orgasm either with her help or alone, depending on whether she’s busy using her vibrator or giving me oral.
Does anyone else incorporate intercourse denial into their chastity lifestyle? I understand the appeal of having your partner ride you while you hold back from cumming inside, so it’s not surprising that fewer people practice this. Just curious to hear others’ thoughts.